Interview - for 14.2. (Valentine's day) Multiple love instead of affairs: Big challenges for only a few

Matthias Röder from the German Press Agency (dpa) interviewed Stefan Ossmann on the topic of polyamory due to Valentine's Day. The original text is to be found here (dpa-account requested). Translation has been done by google translate, so apolgies for spelling or other mistakes.


The following newspapers have quoted the article:

Hannoversche Allgemeine (GER): "Wenn eine Frau zwei Partner hat"

Bluewin (SUI): "Vielliebe statt Affäre"

inFranken (GER): "Deshalb ist Polyamorie eine große Herausforderung"

Lübecker Nachrichten (GER): "Polyamorie. Wenn eine Frau zwei Partner hat"

Märkische Allgemeine (GER): "Wenn eine Frau zwei Partner hat"

Schweriner Volkszeitung (GER): "Polyamorie: Vielliebe statt Affäre"

Göttinger Tageblatt (GER): "Polyamorie. Wenn eine Frau zwei Partner hat"

Der Prignitzer (GER): "Polyamorie: Vielliebe statt Affäre"

Norddeutsche Neueste Nachrichten (GER): "Vielliebe statt Affäre"



Compersion if the partner has just sex with someone else?
If you can not, you should let your fingers loose.
A few dare anyway.

Vienna (dpa) - The love or polyamory sounds for some to pleasure, but is a demanding form of the intimate relationship with several people. "It is complex," says the researcher Stefan Ossmann from the University of Vienna. How many people live such a love with their great challenges - such as replacing jealousy with fellow travelers - is unclear. It just seems to be: it is a topic, to which everyone has an opinion.

Question: Now is Valentine's Day. That means, who lives polyamor, has to give some bouquets?

Answer: Whoever lives in polyamor is concerned not only with Valentine's Day, but 365 days a year with themes such as respect and appreciation. Valentine's Day is losing importance in such an environment.

Question: What are the main problems with a non-monogamous relationship?

Answer: One of the essential keys to success is that all parties involved must replace jealousy with a sense of sympathy. You have to learn that. Besides, the scarce good seems to be the attention and the time for each other. Love is enough there.

Question: Who is interested in polyamory?

Answer: They are people who fall in love with each other. They are people who have always felt polyamorous. These are couples who, after a long life together, find that they are emotionally or sexually too little satisfied. Behind it is sometimes simply curiosity. And it is not a male phenomenon. Women are just as interested as men.

Question: Are there any numbers to spread the love?

Answer: No scientifically verifiable. It is sometimes referred to by about five percent of adults. I think this is possible in the sense of polyamorous. Polyamory is actually lived by perhaps 0.5 per cent, the proportion of the people being spoken is even lower.

Question: This seems very clear.

Answer: It is complex. It requires absolute transparency. The knowledge of all parties involved distinguishes the love from the affair. And it is further stigmatized. To a celebration, to a wedding celebration, to come as a lesbian or gay couple, is no longer a problem today. Imagine, however, a woman attends a wedding officially with her two partners.

Question: Does the subject actually play a role in the film?

Answer: Yes, there are some movies and also a series about it. Even in the US. Of course there are quotas. And polyamory is a subject to which everyone has an opinion. Similar to vegan diet.

PERSON: Stefan Ossmann (41) is working at the University of Vienna on a three-year research project funded by the Austrian Science Fund, on which he promotes.

Copyright: dpa